INSANE

She is beautiful girl and popular to men in their University, her name is Carmi. She has a long black hair that can be compared to black pearls and a skin as smooth as porcelain. She basically has everything and most girls envy her well, most hated her. Josephine cannot see the point why Carmi flirts with her boyfriend Sam when in fact Carmi knows that she had the looks and the body to capture every man she wished for.

If these two girls were to ask of things inside their bags Carmi will definitely answer lipstick and face powder while Josephine will utter books and eyeglasses. Yes, these two girls are total opposites the only thing they got in common is Sam.

Josephine was simply annoyed whenever she saw Carmi and her beauty conscious friends chitchat together. She just hated the idea that these girls all know is to make themselves pretty. Every girl has a story to tell, but their stories are really sucks. She considered them under develop whores and she just can’t stop calling them names especially when they start to talk about her dear Sam. She knew long before that Carmi really likes her Sam but much to everyone’s surprise he courted her instead. But Carmi, knowing the fact that Sam is now her man, didn’t stop just yet to tell her fantasies to her friends.

“He was so cute and if you could only see his eyes when he looks at me, it feels like a lightning struck to me and it goes to my heart and then beneath my soul.” Carmi said as Josephine accidentally passed by a room where Carmi and her friends had a so called girl talk. Josephine hid behind the window and started spying. “I wanted him to hold my hands because I know he needed someone to hold to,” Carmi added with her very sentiment bared to everyone. “He may deny it but I know he’s lonely and I hate seeing him on that mood”.

            “My Sam doesn’t beed your hands, thank you. He’s well comfortable with mine, may I correct you. We’re pretty happy..psychotic girl!” Josephine shouted to herself as she releaseher anger on the plant in front of her. “She better stop talking now or else…” she was pulling every leaf of the plant as she recalled the last statement of Carmi before parting from her friends, “I need to be near him.”

            Josephine was really annoyed what does Carmi mean? She needs to calm down. Sam won’t cheat on her. She knew that true love is the foundation of their relationship and there is no way for Carmi to ruin it. She had to release her anger, she has to talk to someone. Her friends already went home so she decided to bother her cousin Emily instead.

As she talked she figured out that her cousin doesn’t want any company for the moment because she was too focused reading on her philosophy book. Her cousin is a weirdo but she doesn’t have any choice. She rather choose to talk to this pathetic one than to let her mind blow of fury.

‘She’s a total freak, you know that? ” her words cannot be delayed as she rests on the other side of the bed. “Oh I’ve got a wonderful idea, what if I’ll go to our Guidance Councilor and ask him to help Carmi with her psychological problem?” Her idea made her stand and breathlessly faced Emily to see an unconcious expression. She was still waiting for her cousin’s reactions but still after a couple of minutes, her face didn’t move a muscle at all. “C’mon don’t you have anything to say? I need some consoling here help!”. She placed her hands on her waist. “It’s late I must sleep” after a long wait her cousin answered as she closes her book and headed to her lamp to turn it off and sleep leaving her standing eyes flaming with anger.

“This is really a not so very, very good night I’ve ever had in my entire life.” She uttered in anger slamming the door as she walked out the room.

Josephine was late on her first subject the next day because she had a hard time sleeping last night. The though of Carmi seducing her Sam bothers her so much that she almost forgot the examination she ought to take half an hour from now. She is sitting on the corridor hallway when she saw Sam with his friends at the parking lot. He looks happy, she guessed. The smile on his face makes her smile too.

“Carmi misunderstood everything” she murmured as she started writing notes into her pad. For heaven’s sake, she knows that she must be focusing on her notes right now but she can’t stop herself from thinking about Sam. “We had an agreement that’s it! If she’s thinking that me and Sam split up because she doesn’t see us together this past few days, well she’s taking the situation wrong!!!”

Sam and Josephine had an agreement that they won’t stick together whenever there are major exams. They did try to study together several times but instead of reading they both got failing examination results.

She had to pause for a while to think if she’ll not going to break their agreement now or leave Carmi on her wrong assumption for all she care. She need to be with Sam..to be secured one more time.

As she stood and started heading to Sam she saw the smile that always made her day. Who would not love a man that can make your weak knees seeing that closed up smile? Sam from a distance waved on her and made a sign that he would just call her after his class. Josephine looked at her wristwatch and it is already past three in the afternoon she almost forgot the examination and she knew that Sam had exams too. Having no choice, Josephine disappointedly nodded then sighed until he was out of sight.

On her way to the classroom she saw Carmi talking to a friend. “He called me last night and said he’s sorry because he felt like he took me for granted.” She’s aware that she’s fifteen minutes late on her examination but she just can’t miss out any words Carmi might tell. Her grades didn’t matter anymore she’ll listen. ‘And this morning I saw him outside our house waiting for me. We talked.” That’s it! Josephine totally stunned as she heard her saying the words she didn’t wanted to hear. ‘Is it possible that Sam is cheating on her?” She better look for Sam. Enough of spying she needs answers right now!

She prepared herself for the worst situation to happen as she walks through the hallway towards Sam’s classroom but he was not there. She looked at every room in every building but Sam nowhere to be found. She is about to lose hope when she heard a car stopped on the other side of the road. It was Sam. She almost collapsed as she saw Carmi inside the car, smiling. She can’t believe it’s true. Sam did cheat on her. She felt heaven and earth dragged up and down. Her breath stuck on her throat and she can feel her heart stop from beating. Her muscles to weak to stand and for just seconds she became pale.Her emotions betrayed her and suddenly drops of tears flowed from her eyes down to cheeks. Public didn’t matter she cried releasing all the pain and regrets.

Sam didn’t call she kept her cellphone on and even turned the tone on maximum but he didn’t call. No matter how she convince herself that the ride meant nothing yet still the phone didn’t ring. She must stop this foolishness if Sam can’t be honest with her she will let him be. It doesn’t matter anymore how much the truth will hurt she needs to know.

She could almost see the end of it when he saw Carmi talking to her friend on the last step of the stair. Drums hammered her heart fast as she gets nearer to them. She not expecting an early an early confrontation her plan is to talk to Sam first to clear the matter but since Carmi is now here she decided to deal with her anyway. Only a step drew them apart. She is tanding facing their backs when she finally got the courage to speak when Carmi’s voice came in. Her words don’t sound usual she seems to be bothered and Josephine is not used to it. Her instinct dictates that she must listen. So she does.

“He picked me up yesterday and we went to a park” as Carmi continues her story. “We talked a lot of things until we eneded up talking about Josephine.” Josephine’s ears turned big and she moved closer as curiosity pulls her into the conversation. “He said that he couldn’t believe that it’s happened between them. He just can’t take the distance that’s getting farther and farther as time goes by.”

Distance, distance, distance, the words keep on echoing on her consciousness as Carmi delivers her next outburst. “Since that day he can’t figure out what exactly had happened. He tried to convince himself that it was purely destiny but he can’t accept the truth”. Josephine still puzzled of what Carmi’s talking about moved closer and closer. “Helongs for her and he is not contented with just a piece of memory he wanted her back into his life.” “I did not go anywhere you…you let him think that I don’t exist” her mind speaking to Carmi. “I wanted him to forget her, to move on, the world waits for him. There are lots of good things waiting for him it did not end there.” GRIEF. ‘She doesn’t belong to him… never!!!” ‘he is mine you know it from the start” Josephine answered Carmi’s final anguish. She stood up because of excitement. She needs to meet up with Sam. Whatever his sentiments are.. she will be willing to patch things up. She knew it. Sam really loves her and he won’t cheat on her. A smile flushed on her face. She indeed grabbed the last laught after all. As she stepped forward she heard Carmi’s friend talk. ;hush…he’ll realize it soon don’t worry.”

“Realization..what was that…and when?” Carmi is confused. ‘Josephine has been dead for five months, he should have recovered from that loss. That day on the parking lot was really horrifying. Who would have thought that a car inside the university would ran over here? It was an accident and no one expects it to happen.” DEAD. Josephine stunned she wanted to laugh at them, tell them that they are fools. Carmi and her friends really have mental problems…

Before she took off she faced the two girls with her hands on her waist, But much to her surprise she felt a strange sensation into her boday passing beneath her bones. She was shocked. The girls just passed through her and she abruplty felt the coldness.. but there wasn’t any wind.  Instant solitude came. She’s fighting the sensation of numbness but to no avail.

Darkness. Followed next was a cloud full of darkness that effortlessly succumb her consciousness. Her memory slowly captured her being. Noises, pathetic faces, she heard the ambulance singing, the voices of men everywhere commanding students not to cross the line. A man I weeping besides her, blood stained his clothes, his face on his hands…he was crying, Sam was crying.

Her sight drew dim, tears blur everything she could clearly see a while ago. That day, a tragedy happened. She doesn’t want to think of it. Denial. That is what she’s trying to do. She needs to see Sam. She needs him that she is alive. She runs as fast as she can to reach him. He was there..in the parking lot and he was holding something she could hardly see. She moved closer and touched him. He must feel her touch. Her warmness like before.

Josephine felt nothing but coldness as her hands pass through his shoulders. She breathed deeply and closed her eyes. Again she attempt to caress his face but he rhand no longer has the power to console the nature of reality. She stood in front og him face to face but she couldn’t see his eyes. He’s in front of her but his eyes can’t find her.

Suddenly tears flowed and she couldn’t stop his tears. She control as she cried harder, she can no longer fight the denial. She is dead. She is dead. She found a hollow soul deep into his eyes. Blag!! He dropped something. A book. It’s her cousins. She kneeled down She could feel the roughness and the ashes that pondered in it as it lay on the land. She needs to carry the book back into his hands but when she finally looked up everything turned into dark.

Another darkness.Strange.Then one by one she saw the students heading to the parking lot. Bang! The sound was earsplitting. Then she saw her cousin running towards her, armed stretched her face wet with tears. Bang! With just a blink of an eye..her cousin dropped dead. She screamed so loud that it caught the attention of everyone. Then she heard another gun fire one afther the other. She saw armed men marching in the parking lot. Blood thirsty men who murdered almost everyone. Her eyes looks for someone..she couldn’t find Sam. She started running faintly, too scared to be seen by those brutal armed man.

“Help!!!” she heard voices screaming with terror. It’s Carmi and her friends. Josephine wanted to help them but it was too late. A knife was struck into Carmi’s throat as she attempts for another call. Then very loud gun fires followed. Smoke covered the dead body of the girls she hated most. She doesn’t want this. No. The tought of it scared her as she run. But when she finally saw Sam a harsh car bumped her off.

Noises, pathetic faces, she heard the ambulance again, the voices of men everywhere commanding students not to line. A man is weeping beside her, his clothes blood stained. She thought it was hers but she was wrong.

“This is a tragedy. No one made it. Everyone is dead!!”

“No this girl made it. She is alive!” the nurse smiled at Josephine.